Letters to the Editor often make me laugh. The letters usually come in the form of "Oh my gosh, what in the #*$% was this person thinking?" Sometimes in the form of teaching tools for my writing classes, often of the "don't ever do this" variety. Yesterday's paper offered a priceless two-for-one. I include the full text here. I dare you to make sense of it.
Here's a new way to hold elections:
Have all registered votes register their e-mail.
Then all candidates can send the voters an e-mail with what they plan to do when elected.
The voters then Google them when they get the e-mail, to check them out.
If they see anything they like, they can then save them in "my documents."
Just before election day they can review all the saves and decide on the one best qualified.
Then click on that one, open it and install it.
If, after a fair trial, they are not happy with how they perform, they just click on it and then click on undo and delete it.
Then check out the saves again and try another one until they get one they like.
It's all free and saves everyone a lot of time.I'll be danged if anything like this option ever saves anyone anything. But I'll be equally danged if it hasn't offered me many, MANY laughs. Unfortunately, they have all come at someone else's expense. I tried to explain this letter as someone's failed attempt at humor or satire or something. Instead, I'm left feeling like some elderly gentleman has recently learned how to use a computer, thinks it is magic, and wants to share his discovery with the world.
Though there have been many more giggles from my direction lately, I'm going to let this one have all the glory today. Enjoy!